Have you ever had one of those days where you feel unattractive? No matter what you put on, how you style your hair, or the amount of makeup you wear nothing seems to work. It drives you crazy, right? It is tough to feel self-conscious around your peers, wondering if you are good enough. Coming from someone who had low self-esteem, I know how it feels trying to impress others. After years of practicing self-love, I must say I love all of me. Loving yourself should come with no strings attached, meaning you should love yourself unconditionally. Without saying a word, your self-esteem should speak for you. The amount of love you carry inside should light up the room.
As women, we have moments of self-doubt. Society paints a picture of the way we should be and it takes a toll on the true reality of what it is like to be a woman. If someone has low self-esteem, being told the “right” way to look and dress can torment their character. Though we may not like to admit it, having healthy self-esteem takes practice. Even the most self-confident woman has her days. You must train your mind to shut out negative inner thoughts. You have the decision to be the best version of you. It is alright to impress the right people; however, the real challenge is your impression of yourself. Do you truly know how beautiful and outstanding you are? The physical attributes you possess are what make you stand out as an individual. Your lips, hips, and eyes will always be a part of you. Learn to appreciate the woman you were created to be.
High self-esteem not only boosts your confidence, it also draws people to you. When others can see the amount of dignity you possess, they want to be around you more. If you are the person who thinks highly of yourself, instill the same importance of self-love into the next person. Sometimes it takes being told how special you are in order to believe it. It was not until I began receiving compliments from my middle school teachers, that I realized how beautiful I was. I understood why the girls talked about me and said I thought I was better. I could have allowed it to demean who I was, but instead the hatred fed my spirit and I loved myself even more. One thing I learned is to never change who you are for the benefits of other people. There will always be spectators who will try to bring you down. Often, when someone speaks negatively about you, it is because they do not think much of themselves.
Write a list of things you adore about yourself. Those are the things no one should be able to take away. I Am statements are powerful and come from the heart. I am beautiful, I am an innovator, and I am important. Believe those words and your self-confidence will grow into something spectacular. Before you know it, you will be able to look in the mirror and love every inch of you. We all have flaws, as humans we are naturally flawed people. It is up to you to find the beauty in the things which society may deem as weird or taboo. The less you care, the happier you will be. As women, it is extremely vital to encourage and uplift each other. We know what it is like to fall short some days. We know what it is like to be filled with a million uncontrollable emotions. Certain days feel like a roller-coaster, however being the strong women that we are, we continue to strive for greatness.
I challenge you to love yourself more and to go easy on your heart. It is okay to fail. It is okay to lack all of the answers. I challenge you to pay it forward with encouragement and compliments towards women. I challenge you to smile more and doubt yourself less. You are special in more ways than you could ever imagine. Remember, what you think of yourself matters more than what the world thinks of you. Carry your high self-esteem with you everywhere you go. You will walk differently, talk differently, and release positive energy.
You matter and the world needs you.
I AM: Two most powerful words, for what you put after them shapes your reality.
Growing up I hustled for money; now that I am older I hustle for growth, experiences, and "money." There are so many different definitions of the word hustle and everyone hustles differently. My kind of hustle is having the confidence, courage and self determination to work hard towards an accomplishment.
Working full time and having a side hustle isn't easy. For those looking in from the outside it may appear to be easy but everything starts with motivation, determination, and executing goals. Trust me when I say things can become overwhelming and you may become restless depending on what your hustle is but the outcome is worth it.
My drive to hustle started when I was younger. One day I had to ask my mom for something my dad said he was going to do but never did, I'm pretty sure it had something to do with giving me money. Whatever the situation was, my mom told me I couldn't always wait and depend on other people to do things for me, I needed to learn how to do thing for myself. Every since her statement I would always find ways to hustle and get the things I wanted. I started off by charging family members and friends to do chores, babysit, and braid hair. When someone asked me to do something I would always ask him or her how much was the pay.
Now as an adult, I am still hustling; This time around I am trying to gain experience and growth in the blogging/writing and marketing industry. I enjoy getting creative so why not put my talent to use. However, hustling is not easy. In my situation I really have to put in work to reach my goals. I work a full time job with some major responsibilities that require me to be focused and always open to learning new things. When you want something you have to find out how to make things happen especially when you already have a full time schedule.
Here are five few steps to consider when hustling and working a full time job:
One thing to always keep in mind outside of my list is to remember why you started. There is a quote I constantly going by: “when you feel like giving up, remember why you started.” Don’t compare your success to others. Just like everyone hustles different, everyone’s success is different. If you compare yourself to other people you won't be able give your goals 100 percent of your focus and effort. Review my five steps and derive your own hustle steps, feel free to borrow and tweak! Now go be great -- stay focused, remember your why and hustle hard.
By: Tabitha D. James, Business Strategist
Who is in your inner most circle? Are these folks fueling your energy to elevate or draining your ability to push through obstacles? It is important for us to take a personal inventory of our life circle(s) every now and then. The people who once served you, may not serve you in this season. You must be okay with that to win. Winners strategically surround themselves with the right people to mobilize. As survivors, it is extra critical for our circles to be balanced. This helps ensure mental and emotional wellness.
Circle building can be quite difficult. Who do you trust? Who do you cut? Who do you keep but not too close? . . . The key? Finding discernment and knowing yourself. Having a strong sense of what you need, where you're headed and what that looks like will help with curating your circle. Remember, you are the sum of the 5 people you spend the most time with. Don't allow this equation to hinder you, allow it to be your push to ensure your circle is intentional, influential (positively) and supporting in the way that benefits all involved in a special way.
Here are three easy questions you can use to self-assess and create a circle that suits you:
"As I enter a new phase of life and my circle broadens, I start learning new things."